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The 3 Steps to your Most Empowered Self

To be brave, means to have courage.

To have courage means to have confidence.

And confidence means to have belief in yourself.

It’s not those who can get the laws of the universe to bend around them, it’s those who believe, deep down, in the possibility for their lives, in the ultimate possible fate for their life which seems so close and clear in their heart.

So how do you get to a point where you can clearly see the ultimate possibility of your life? When you live in courage and not fear all that is possible?

It all starts by getting to know who you are, deep down, in the fiber of your being. How you were made, those unchangeables that just are; that which makes you unique and powerful when you're in alignment with who you were designed to be.

We often start with what beliefs. How do you think the world works? What are the experiences in life that have informed you of the "laws" of life? Which have you created and which beliefs did you inherit or were taught?

This is what coaches are looking for when they are speaking with you. Strong beliefs that are keeping the blinders on - limiting what you can see that is possible for yourself and for others. Coaches hear your story and sense where there is a charge; it's often in those places that micro traumas happen and a belief is formed. Seeing our patterns and beliefs outside our heads and through someone else’s eyes is invalualbe. And there is no other place to do this than in connection with another who is on the outside of our everyday lives.

It’s only then that you can begin to see the difference between what is true for you vs. who you have had to become for approval, acceptance, success, love, etc...

And, often, we are so scared of our best selves. It's as if we can sense how powerful we are and that if we really applied ourselves to a life of truth and wholeness we'll actually be seen for who we are, fully! That carries such vulneratbility and requires courage. It's easier to be rejected when you feel someone doesn't really know you. But when they can see you, all of you, it stings so much worse when another doesn't see the magic in who we are.

To prepare yourself for your ultimate expression, remember that with vulneratbilty comes leadership. You cannot separate the two. When you step into who you are, honest and true, you invite others to do the same. Often I find that people are less judgementmental of those who claim their truth and more envious of their clarity and the freedom that comes with boldly being who you are.

If you decide to dig deep and begin to examine your beliefs, you’ll find a whole new world opens up. You’ll find joy, light, hope, peace, aspiration, and inspiration to become who you are. A vision for the ultimate possibility of your life begins to emerge. And an acceptance of the parts of yourself you wish would go away creeps in, slowly but assuredly, helping you see that all of you, every single bit, is part of your design, is part of your magic.

There may be no better feeling than to be at home in who you are. To arrive at a deep knowing of your authentic self and how you want to make your imprint on the world is a gift you accept for yourself and give countless times to others who are touched by truth.

You literally begin to change the world as we know it. You step into something bigger, something meant to be, and you unlock the first tiny step for someone else to do the same.

This isn’t easy, it takes time and focus to question everything we've taken as truth. But it’s so freeing. When you examine the way you believe the world to work and your place in it, you show up in the world feeling grounded and bound to your future by your truth. Any struggle comes with a promise for better. One bad day, one bad week, doesn’t sway you. You know it is part of the journey, and you know what lies on the other side.

I’ve found a simple way to start down the path. There are three steps. I call it The Empowerment Formula. And it isn’t complex. I’ve come to believe that if you can simply say yes to starting, to the possibility that’s on the other end, then you can absolutely change your life for the better. No matter what life situation you are in now. It all begins with one little yet courageous step.

And the best part, following this formula gives you clarity in everything you do and helps you course-correct with conviction. Feeling assured supports confidence and follow-through.

I am not suggesting a quick-fix. This isn’t that. This is a promise of simplicity. What it takes to live with clarity, purpose and fulfillment isn’t complicated, but getting to the yes — and then getting to the heart of what is deep-down you — sometimes can be. And, in my opinion, it’s not a journey to be taken alone. It’s one that requires some outside eyes to reflect that which we don’t see. Coaches being the best partner, an unbiased third party, trained to guide you through the process gently and not let any shortcuts compromise the truth-finding experience.

So here it is, the three-part formula for living your best life:

  • Deeply know who you are: Core Values (watch this video to learn how to identify your core values)

  • Understand why you’re here: Mission and Purpose

  • Learn to navigate through resistance: Taking Inspired Action

That’s it. Once you know what you need in your life to feel happy and fulfilled (core values) and get a deeper sense of what you want to create with your life (your mission and purpose for being), you then have a direction to move in (inspired action). Seeing the plan, vision, or outlook becomes easy and motivates that first step.

It's like coming to a clearing in a forest where you can finally orient yourself and see your place in life and which direction you want to go. And as you take a step, get in momentum, you immediately start your life on a trajectory to what you want. We have a choice each day, each minute really, on the direction we want to steer our life. And it's much easier to stay aligned and make choices that deliver what we want when we know who we are and where we're going.

What we don't often account for is that becoming the person you want to be means you have to believe it's possible and that you deserve it. Our mental view of ourselves has to change along with our actions. It can't be "when I get to the goal I'll finally be who I want to be." You have to be who you want to be now, start living the life you want to live now, and you'll create it AND be able to receive it when it arrives. When I say receive it, I mean fully become the real you in a way that isn't a phase or a destination that's hard to hold onto. It becomes your new normal - a happy place - a place you stay without effort.

I have found coaching to be an incredible tool in expediting clarity, both of who I am and what I want. That empowers me to move forward with conviction which enables more learning and more fine-tuning as I experience life differently. And when I doubt myself, begin to slip back into hold patterns, or simply want to give up, my coach is there to remind me of what I want and why; the big juicy and delicious feeling of being who I am in a life that allows me to come alive. What's required for all this reward is simply deciding you're ready and taking the first step.

We will create a flexible coaching program for you that starts with helping you remember who you are and ends with clarity on why you’re here and what you want next. It’s the best way to uncover your truth. And it’s how I originally did it — to find my own truth. Start here to get matched with the right coach for you.

It feels so good to deeply know who you are and to believe in the realization of your best self. It’s not something to be feared, it’s something to be embraced. And we’re here to help each and every person who knows deep down there is more to life that they want to experience.



I started Collective Gain out of a desire make work better, where being on a magic team was the norm vs. a rare chance occurrence. Through coaching, I discovered deep self-awareness, new perspectives and ways of working that I am passionate about bringing to you.

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